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From: King Toad
To: The Laphroaig Distillery
I live in the USA and often enjoy a glass of your whiskey while relaxing at home. Last year, I was disappointed to see that Scotland failed to pass its vote in favor of independence from Britain. Continue reading
Are you concerned about God ripping you away from your earthly sin-embracing body and taking you to a boring “Salvation party” filled with Mormons?
Are you uneasy that 72 virgins might be an awful lot of bitching to deal with for the rest of eternity? Continue reading
The Töad King is always right.
Fortunate coincidences are proof that the gods smile favorably on the Meädow.
We will love you because you will be one of us. You will be a beloved part of our family.
Never joke about the Meädow or the King.
The end will justify the means of all that we do.
If you think the King is seducing 14-year-old girls in the Meädow, he is in fact giving them spiritual lessons. Continue reading
4 am knows all your secrets. Let us prey. With an ey. And take aim with both eyes, as wolves. As toads. As people licking toads. Amen.
Töad Meädow is hunkered down underneath record-breaking snowfall. This photo was taken at the RALF shortly after their snow teams got to work. So we may have a töad on the inside. Shhhhh….don’t tell anyone.